Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
i think i have two assholes
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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