oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
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