And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Randomize