Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize