my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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