I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Oh god it's open bar.
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