The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
