So drunk its hurt
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
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