My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize