Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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