I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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