Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Randomize
