How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
