how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize