And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
we made out on top of his cat.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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