; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
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