in pain and im wearing pink underwear
i dont own pink underwear
tell your sister to shave her snatch
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
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I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
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if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.