He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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