Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
