Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize