Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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