brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Randomize
