How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
