better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Randomize