i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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