I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
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If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
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He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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