going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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