Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
We're not piercing ourselves today.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
You are the jesus of drinking
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
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