We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Randomize
