I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
