In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
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