i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
