Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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