Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Randomize
