why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
