You just made me feel so damn special
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Randomize
