Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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