I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
My breasts were aching with rage.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Randomize