I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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