so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
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