We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize