i don't like sucking hair
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
