I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
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