At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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