if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
