This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
