I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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