Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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