i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
