I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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